For the sake of anyone that has questions or is interested in the actual experience, I'mma write up a long thread of the actual orchiectomy process & aftercare

(Orchiectomy - Day 1 - Timing) 

Mine was scheduled for 11:30AM on Thursday, and I took both that day and Friday off to recover. We arrived at 9:30AM at the request of the surgical center, but due to delays we didn't get rolling until 12:40 or so. I awoke at 2:15PM, and was completely lucid in 10 minutes or so. I was released to my driver at about 2:45 and by this point I was famished.

(Orchiectomy - Day 1 - Medication) 

I had to stop all of my medication on various schedules.

Some I had to stop for a month.
2 weeks for progesterone.
Skip my estrogen shot the Saturday before.
1 week for supplements.
No ADHD meds on the day (I mean, obviously.)
I could continue PrEP and antidepressants.

I was prescribed Tylenol with codeine for pain management, 60 tablets in total, or the clearly much more useful metric of 30 tablets per ball.

(Orchiectomy - Day 1 - Pain Levels) 

Shortly after the anesthesia the pain did start pretty suddenly, very much on par with a kick to the balls. This did calm down on its own. They applied topical anesthetic during surgery, which will wear off.

With medication it aches pretty much on par with post-workout muscle soreness. But like a real intense workout. I can pretty comfortably lie down, ever so slightly less comfortably lie on my side, and walking and standing are also okay.

(Orchiectomy - Day 1 - Aftercare) 

I went home very gauzed up, with the incision glued shut. It should be 24-48hrs before I remove it. Then I can shower, but no baths.

You can ice if you'd like, 15 minutes on and 15 off, and it feels pretty nice.

There is some minor bleeding outside the bandages, which, well, thankfully I keep pads in the downstairs bathroom. (And tampons, spray deodorant, Q-tips, bandaids, floss, etc, all in a cute little basket. Would recommend.)

(Orchiectomy - Day 1 - Surgery Prep) 

Almost forgot prep! I couldn't have metal in your body, so no jewelry. They were okay with non-metallic spacers, so I would advise ordering some well ahead of time. I used a plastic staple retainer in my septum and plastic earrings.

The night before and the morning of you need to shower and scrub the area down with antibacterial soap or Hibiclens.

(Orchiectomy - Day 2 - Pain) 

The bandages came off today. Up until now I haven't really been able to identify what was going on under the gauze. It really not as gnarly as a I expected, just a little bruised.

So interestingly there's really no pain in the scrotal area. It's all in the groin, I believe from removal of the spermatic cord.

(Orchiectomy - Day 3 - Pain) 

This was an interesting change I wasn't expecting. The overall ache in the groin area is gone, but there is a more pronounced, localized pain. It feels a bit like tearing, such as when you slice your finger deeply and bending it causes the two halves to shift. Resting is way more comfy, but I do need to suck it up and keep moving now and then.

I have moved from opioids to Aleve, because it's really that minor. Also to encourage, erm, a movement. (Successfully.)

(Orchiectomy - Day 3 - Bleeding) 

At this point bleeding has completely stopped, so no more pads. Honestly it was almost completely done yesterday, with some minor spots that might have just been tiny nicks from shaving around the surgical site.

(Orchiectomy - Day 3 - Goals) 

One of the things that was both annoying and dysphoric about testicles was feeling them when I closed my legs. I have big, chubby thighs, and they'd get squished between them when I was on my side.

It's bizarre and amazing that they're finally not. It just hits me in flashes, like, "wait, my legs are completely pressed together! 💜"

Also, Christ, tucking is going to be so easy. It was never something I bothered with but I may do it now and again just because.

(Orchiectomy - Day 3 - Sexual Function) 

So everything is still too tender or stitched together to go to town, but I've been sitting at home and curious so I did at least see how she'd react. Also I worried that I should maybe get the full range of motion going so it heals okay, kind of how you're supposed to walk around as well.

It did work great, which is a relief, with no (additional) pain. It'll still be a bit before I can see how orgasm works, though.

(Orchiectomy - Day 4 - (No?) Pain) 

I am truly flabbergasted by the healing time. I'm in so little pain it feels like nothing even happened. Like, yes, if you directly tap the incision it ever so mildly hurts, but in general there's just a very light ache. If the pain before was like the kind that sets in after an intense workout, this is closer to the surprise soreness after a day of screwing together a complicated bookshelf, where you go, "gee, I'm old."

Still on Aleve just to avoid swelling.

(Orchiectomy - Day 4 - Sexual Function) 

Well, she definitely still works.


(Orchiectomy - Day 5 - Back to Work) 

Well, my mobility is unimpeded and I can sit perfectly comfortably, so it's out of my pajamas and back into the office.

It's very strange being concious of a large but invisible change in your own life. Like, I want to just holler into the cubicles, "my scrotum is glued together right now! There's nothing inside it!"

But I won't, because I'm a classy fucking broad.

(Orchiectomy - Day 5 - Bleeding) 

I might need to go back to pads. There has been some very minor bleeding around the edges of the incision with me actually walking around and it slowly coming .

Though I guess ruining a pair of cute panties with blood stains has also been a very gender-affirming experience. Glad I didn't wear my white dress.

(Orchiectomy - Day 9 - Follow Up) 

Had my follow up with the surgeon, who said everything looks good. At this point most of the surgical glue is gone (there's still a few pokey bits.)

Pain levels have been at a .5 for the past two days, and they're practically at a 0 now. Every now and then I might move in a way that makes my pubis or scrotum flare up, but even that pain usually is a 2 to 3 tops. Annoying, but not incapacitating.

(Orchiectomy - Day 13 - Amusing Scrotum Observation) 

I have taken more photos of my scrotum in the past two weeks than I ever have and hopefully ever will for the rest of my life.

They also happen to be some of the most upsetting to look at, purely on an aesthetic scale, but they're medically necessary.

(Orchiectomy - Day 13 - Bleeding/Comfort) 

At this point bleeding is extremely rare, but I have taken to wearing pads regardless, due to the protection they provide. Without them, especially in the heat, chubby thigh rub can anger and inflame the healing surgical site and make it hard to walk. With them there is 0 discomfort all day.

(Orchiectomy - Day 13 - The Stupidest Thing I've Ever Said) 

Curiously the incision site is an extremely pale white compared to the darker brown of my usual genital skin tone. It gives my scrotum the general look of a cartoon pug who walked into a haunted mansion and saw a gh-gh-gh-ghost.

(Orchiectomy - Day 14 - Resuming Body Hair Removal) 

"Wow, that's healed up so well," said my laser tech, before spreading my cheeks and zapping me right where the sun don't shine.

I have to say I think this session hurt a bit more than I remember (this is literally the first time I've ever actually cursed out loud, in two years of laser) but that could be due to me being completely unprepared. Sleep deprived, caffeinated, on no painkillers.

(Orchiectomy - Day 14 - Healing Pictures Timeline) 

One thing that always made me nervous about vaginoplasty or FFS was the thought of seeing it in the mirror for the first time and reacting like Jack Nicholson's Joker. The orchi provided a small scale test to see how I'd feel about my body while it was healing.

If this is a concern of yours and you want to, god bless your soul, see what it would actually look like... well here you go.

(Orchiectomy - Day 13 - The Stupidest Thing I've Ever Said) 

@OhHeyItsAlexis I cannot unsee this mental image, well described!

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